Who Should We Ask?

There is a phenomenom that I have observed amongst some of the younger women that I know...  it goes against what my Mama taught me when my children were young......and I listened to her and applied it to my life..and GUESS WHAT??!!!  my life was hugely benefited from her wise counsel.....

Here is what she told me......if you want to know how to raise your children, find somebody that HAS ALREADY DONE IT!!!!!!!!!  and somebody that was successful at doing it.....(look at their grown children too)  and talk to them...find out what they did and how they did it.......

We are in a society now that doesn't believe that.  I am in a university town and it is filled with young people...and most of them think they are way smarter than the older people....the dynamics of living here can be challenging....
Professors teach from behind their desk about how to run a company without ever having done it themselves......
One of the most popular things is blogging about motherhood...that is wonderful and I am sure keeps a lot of girls sane and feeling like they are not alone...BUT......and a great big but......where are the experienced mamas??  The ones that have done this job of mothering and been successful at it?  I believe there is most definitely a disconnect here between the generations...I don't know how it happened..that is not my worry...My thoughts are about how do we remedy this?
I have observed young mamas that have very little experience trying to guide other young mamas with less experience and they both really NEED some counsel from a much more experienced mama...because from this mamas perspective, neither one of them are giving very good counsel to the other..they are just bouncing back and forth what they have come up with on their own....

Why are the younger women having to do this on their own?   are we as older women not available?  or are they just not willing to listen to older and wiser counsel because it is not what they want to hear?  do they really want to raise successful adults or not?  I have younger and older readers and would love to hear some feedback on this one....

It came about this morning when I was taking pictures of my yard before the sun was over the trees and I realized where I learned to do that....Just a few years ago I would wait til it was nice and bright outside to take pictures and they didn't turn out so good...so I knew my Daddy is a really good photographer so I asked him...He told me to take pictures early morning or late afternoon or stand in the shade if the sun is high....changed the quality of my pictures.......BUT I WENT TO SOMEONE WITH EXPERIENCE IN WHAT I WANTED TO LEARN!!!!!!

for the life of me, I do not understand thinking somebody has good counsel when they have never ever done what you want to know about......they can only give you some opinion of theirs....go for the experience..the more experience, the better.....it is the only way to grow well.....

I am very passionate about this subject....mentoring...listening...mainly choosing wisely the voices we listen to....
not everyone that acts like they know everything actually knows what they are talking about....LOOK at their life...they can only guide you into what they are living.....nothing more....I promise.....

thank you for reading this morning..

.I surely would like to hear what you have to say about this matter.....I think our grandchildren's generation is at stake ... their mamas need to find seasoned and experienced women to listen to..and we need to be available.....

Share what you are experienced in.......whenever a younger woman asks...

be ready.....

Mona

Grandsons

What a joy are my 3 grandsons....they are so different but yet so much alike...They all came to spend the night this week and I was able to capture a little of their personalities with these pictures.....I hope you enjoy this picture....
they are such a delight......

Betsy does a wonderful job of helping them develop their individual temperaments.......truly raising them up in the way they should go....I am sure Mike has a lot to do with this too...they are good parents..these boys are amazing...watch out world!!!  they are going to CHANGE you!!!

thank you for sharing your time with us today.......

Happy FALL!!!!!   so glad to see you once again......I will really enjoy you this year.  I promise....

Remembering Mama

Mama

Today is my beautiful Mama's birthday..she would have been 81 years old.....but I will always remember her as a much younger woman because she died young....she had  just turned 73 years old when she was killed in a tragic car accident that instantly took her life and left my Daddy virtually unharmed except for a few bruises. He literally walked away from the fatal wreck. I will always believe that she was stolen away from this life before it was her time to go. she still had a lot of life to live and a lot of life to pass on to us.....It was because of an accident that she is no longer here.....I don't know if I will ever get over this loss...the pain is not as acute as it used to be but it is still grief, just not the gripping, cannot get away from it kind.......I can think about her without tears now.....there are good memories to focus on.. But I still miss her terribly sometimes...hardly a day goes by that I do not think of her and sometimes I really, really would like to talk things over with her just one more time..I could talk to her about anybody and she would keep it to herself and still love me. :-)

There is not much else like a mama's love... she and I had a rough and rocky relationship for years and years but had come to a place of real understanding and acceptance about 2 years before her death. I am most thankful for those 2 years, as they erased most of the pain of the decades before then.....and as silly as it sounds the Lord used a movie to speak to me, loudly.....to help me see that she was a woman just like me...and I was a woman just like her..... that bond can never be broken and her love for me and who she was will be passed on to my grandchildren...

Will and Mac often point to a picture of her and I tell them over and over who that is...my Mama.. I certainly see her showing up already in my grandsons....they love the dirt..the oldest one is a sure gardener in the making...she would be proud....there is already someone who will continue to grow daylilies.....I know she is smiling about that......

This is just one of the lilies she hybridized and now it grows in my yard....she had a good eye for this....it is one of my treasures....and will be passed along to future generations...it's just what we do..pass along flowers..LOL

Well, you have heard a little of my story involving my Mama....and if you have a mama or you are a mama, your job is very important....your mama is human just like you are.....even if you don't get along now, there is still hope..because how can a mama reject her own child?  it will not always be....I am so very thankful for the last 2 years of Mama's life..we made amends and when she died, I had NO REGRETS...that is a wonderful gift she left me....Peace about our relationship....so never give up...don't lose who you are but also never close the door completely..there might be a miracle around the next bend...there was for me....

So I remember the good things and do not dwell on the bad..I do wish she had lived longer but she didn't and I have come to have peace about that....

Here is a clip from that life changing movie for me....if you are having ANY trouble in your mama relationship, please watch this clip.....it will speak to you..and then watch the movie....it has lots of healing in the story.......




one of my favorite lines in the movie is  Daddy, did you get loved enough?
and he says my question to you is Did YOU get loved enough?

after it was all said and done.....I think I got loved enough.........

My son Jon

Here is a picture of a really beautiful dining room.


It has been totally put together by my son...I have been amazed as I have watched him be transformed over the last year....he had been in a really unhealthy relationship that ended in divorce...and instead of just giving up and retreating from life, he decided to grab life by the horns and ride it for all it's worth...He chose LIFE....

When he sent me this picture this weekend of the finished room, it brought tears to my eyes...wow....this room just pulsates with life and beauty...and the artist in Jon has come alive...he is a true Renaissance man...he has many, many talents......a year ago this room was beige and drab..mismatched and forgotten...dull, dull, dull......like Jon, it has come alive.....

I am so happy to see him living life and trying new things..not settling for mediocre...
Just this year, these are a few of the things I have watched him experience.....he has changed his appearance, he has run a manufacturing plant, he has watched every sporting event, he has landscaped his yard, he has redecorated much of his house, he has learned to cook, he has rebuilt his relationship with his Mama, and the rest of his family, he has traveled to Miami to get a tattoo at Miami Ink, he has traveled to California, he has gone skydiving, he has spent money and he has saved money......yes, this son of mine...I am mighty proud of him.......

just like the mom I was as he played sports..
I am on the sideline holding up the sign that says"THAT'S MY SON JON!!!"

yep, he has done this mama proud.....I am thankful for my son......